My Locks Journey

My decision to go natural started as all else does in my life; a source of rebellion.

As I began to sink deeper into my journey, it became a different type of rebellion. Rebelling against what society has attempted to program me to believing the statutes of beauty consist of.

I am completely amazed at how my programming began at such a young age. Good hair, bad hair nappy hair. Taught that the natural temprement of my hair is something to be ashamed of.

The psychological abuse that accompanies this programming is dynamic is you realize the nature of the beast. Take a group of people and teach them at the core level to self hate and conform.

SIMPLY AMAZING.

However, I digress.

As the realm of my understanding is broadened and the scope of my limitations erased; I find myself amuzed by the befuddling murmuring of the masses. Not to down anyone for their personal choices; however when you set your mouth or disapproving eye on my head; you set yourself up for calmity.

Somehow, my ability to abandon hiding has further emboldened me, (if that were at all possible). I find myself attempting to dissect why for years I allowed myself to place a hairstyle on a pedalstool.

Hair doesn't make a real woman... a real woman understands that it is just hair.

This ephiphany has began to realign other aspects of my perspective.  How I view men, women, children (still mostly icky). I find myself like the weird guy from American Beauty, stopping to find beauty in the oddest things. The other day it was raining and I stared at a ball of leaves as they seemed to dance to the beat of the rain as it composed a perfect symphony. Today on the way to work a squirell sat impatiently waiting as a group of children impeded his progress nut hunting. The intensity in his beatty little eyes as he strung his hands together not wanting to lose his spot but noticing that the children were drawing closer was absolutely stunning to me.

I find myself anxious now more than ever. Envy would be a gross misrepresentation of how I feel toward those who have vested more time and have long sexy locks...

Yes dammit.. I said sexy.

I guess my journey/adventure as everything else in my life is paving its own course. I am not sure if the world can handle me becoming any more comfortable with myself but hey.... they'll adjust.

If not, they will find themselves run the #@#$$% over!